Today, I found myself giving a Eulogy for The Death of a Listing. It was a difficult task, but a necessary one. It read like this:
Mr. Rambler passed away on Friday, October 30, 2009, leaving behind his faithful Realtor and beloved neighbors who were visibly shaken from his sudden untimely death. Survived by two neighbors, (one of which is battling the cancer of all sales), who will go on to diligently maintain the local neighborhood watch program.
It's a shame that very few buyers visited Mr. Rambler before his passing. He lived a life of lonely solitude, which may have contributed to his premature death. Mr. Rambler was a bit of a character, always wanting his cake and eating it too. Perhaps his insatiable appetite for potlucks and newspaper ads contributed to his demise. I'm sad to say that Mr. Rambler also lived a life above his means and unfortunately let his good looks go to hell as time went by. Surely, his high maintenance diet is what killed him.
Mr. Rambler will be buried where all expired listings go, the Dead Cemetery. Let's remember, that in times like these, life must go on. There will be other Ramblers who will come and go. We can only hope that they'll have better diets with healthier floor plans and kinder expectations. In the meantime, Mr. Rambler - May You Rest In Peace!